Companionable

It was nice last night, driving home with CK and settling down for bed.  I felt anxious when I finally got into bed, chilled and hyper-alert.  No monkey mind, just urgent wakefulness.  CK murmured sleepily at me, I answered back that it wasn't anything in particular, nothing triggered.  Just the anxious business of being around a crowd of people, the talking.  She curled herself against my back, warming and comforting me.  I fell asleep fairly soon after that.

Woke up five minutes before my alarm feeling awake, although not entirely rested.  I got into the shower and dressed.  CK woke up and wished me a good morning before I headed off to the office.  Spent a busy day, more working with people and less on code.  Tomorrow's shaping up to be much of the same.

Tonight's the second night we've had where I see her after work or teaching, we have dinner and spend the night together.  I've stopped thinking of it as "bonus" time together and started seeing it as the way we practice being together full time.  

I was chatting with an old friend from college this evening, unexpectedly.  He was commenting how we all looked so much better now, how we've all seem to have learned about who we are.  I noted that I finally stopped trying to fit in.